The Grey Light Of Morning
by Vampbarbie
Summary: Six years and he has known nothing but these grey walls and the jigsaw patch of sky above them.


The Grey Light Of Morning

He wonders if anyone will even bother to come today. He pushes his too long hair out of his eyes and walks towards the gate that will open to give him his freedom. Six years and he has known nothing but these grey walls and the jigsaw patch of sky above them. He has been in here for something so insignificant compared to everything else he has done that it is laughable. He has faced Reavers and lived, albeit with the scars to prove the tale; he has ran from the law more times that he can count; he has defied governments; and he was arrested and tried for petty theft on some backwards world by a hick jury where just being from off world was enough to send him down. He can't quite believe that it happened to him. He's seen the inside of a cell before but six years was nearly enough to send him loopy. Sometimes he wonders if it did.

She wrote to him every couple of weeks. Like she promised, in tears, the last time they spoke through a glass partition in the sheriff's office. Posted from whatever post station she was nearest at the time. She wrote about their little girl. How ironic was that? He finally managed to sleep with his girl once and got incarcerated before he got a chance to touch her again. She wrote three months later to tell him she was pregnant. She tells him their precious girl has his eyes. His eyes and her hair, apparently. He has never seen her to know, only one capture when she was tiny. Too small and young to tell whose eyes she had in a screwed up red face.

She says she will be waiting today but he isn't so sure. Maybe no one will come. They didn't stop moving to wait six years. They couldn't afford to. He'd told them in no uncertain terms not to attempt a rescue mission of any kind. He had done the crime and did not want them to risk themselves attacking the best-defended building on the planet. Foolishness. The kind that would get them killed.

He misses Serenity. He misses the crew. He misses the very smell of the ship. The feel of the floor humming constantly under his feet. She writes of their escapades and adventures and near misses. She tells him when people get sick or accidents happen. He cries with her when she is sad and wishes he could put his arms around her.

He thinks he has changed from being inside. He does not yet know how much. He didn't let himself break away from her. He knows what the other prisoners muttered about him, about what he believes in, and he didn't care. He kept himself to himself and they learned early on not to bother him. For good reason. He knew how to hurt a man in ways that worried even the most hardened criminal in here.

He scratches at his stubble as the gates creak open to the dusty world beyond the walls, and he blinks in the bright light of the early morning. He hefts the pack containing his personal belongings under his arm. He can hear the hum of Serenity's engines somewhere in the middle distance. Far enough that it is out of sight behind the low dusty yellow hills, but close enough to hear. They obviously still haven't fixed that loose connection; he can pick up its faint rattle even after this long away from his home.

About one hundred metres in the distance he spots them next to the hunkered shape of the mule. She standing and shielding her eyes from the sun with her hand. He feels his heart leap from his chest to his throat and swallows thickly. Standing at her side is a small figure clutching something to her chest. His legs continue to take him towards her, slowly at first then he starts to run. She starts running too. He drops his pack into the dirt just as she throws herself into his arms with enough force that he staggers a little as he catches her. She buries her face against his neck. He pulls her face up and kisses her fiercely.

"I missed you," she mumbles against his lips.

"I love you," he says sincerely. "Gorramit I love you so much."

She has tears in her eyes and keeps kissing him, her arms tight around his neck and her body leant into his as much as she physically can.

"I love you too," she whispers voice rough with emotion.

He kisses her again, breathing in the very scent of her. The smell of home and of freedom. So sweet after six empty years trying to recreate that smell in his mind.

Finally she pulls away slightly and stares at him, half nervously. "You should meet your daughter."

She takes him by the hand and leads him the few paces towards the little girl who is clutching a teddy bear to her chest and staring at him fearfully. She has been silently watching the whole exchange.

"Serena this is your daddy," she says pushing the little girl forward.

The girl takes a long look at him, nervously gripping the teddy between her hands.

He squats down in the dirt. "Hi," he says softly reaching out to her.

Serena shrinks back behind her mother's leg and he rocks back on his heels hesitantly. He looks up and wonders why he never thought of her as a 'mother' before this very moment. She gently pushes their daughter forward again and the little girl stares at him beneath a cloud of her mother's hair with his eyes and holds out her small hand nervously.

He gently takes it. "Hi, I'm your daddy." The word sounds strange coming from his mouth. He isn't anyone's daddy. He doesn't have that right. He hasn't been here for his little girl. Either of his girls.

"Daddy!" Serena throws herself at him.

He catches her and stands up, holding her tightly against his chest. She smells like her mother who is smiling at him like her gorram world has come alive in this one moment. He feels like a fraud while the tears spring to his eyes unbidden.

"Don't cry daddy," his little girl looks at him her lower lip wobbling, and her mother doesn't look much better. "Did I make you sad? Is that why you never came?"

"Oh is that what you thought?" he asks the little girl aghast. "You're my xiao gongzhu. I'm crying because I'm happy! I tried so hard to get to you baby."

He shifts Serena onto one arm and stoops to sling his pack awkwardly over one shoulder. She is smiling at him but there is worry in her eyes. He puts his free arm around her and pulls her close. "I'm still the same man who left," he whispers in her ear.

She shakes her head so that her hair tickles his cheek. "No. You're not." She raises a hand and touches the faint scar that traces its way across his ear and left cheek. "What happened in there?"

He shakes his head. "Not now. But I swear I'll make you happy."

"I know."

"No you don't!" he snaps sharper than intended. "You were all that kept me going in there. The thought that I'd get back to you! I'm not proud of who I became in there but he is gone now. I'm just me. You loved me once, please Kaylee, please."

She gapes at him a moment then presses her lips to his so hard that he bites his lip. He wraps his arm around her back and holds her tightly to his chest. Kaylee's hands come up to his face and her thumb traces the outline of his jaw through the dark stubble there, all the while kissing him fiercely.

Finally she pulls away. "You're such an idiot," she says staring him in the eyes.

"And you're beautiful," he says back sincerely. "My xin gan."

"And say my name again," she says staring intently at him.

"Kaylee," he whispers in her ear. "I love you Kaylee."

She grins happily at him. "We'd better get back to the ship Cap'n'll be waiting."

He rolls his eyes. "Can't I bypass them and just take you to your bunk?" he growls at her with a naughty grin back.

"Can't Simon." Kaylee shakes her head. "River will be waiting."

"No River is not."

They both turn their heads and find River standing beside them.

"Mei mei I…"

River shakes her head. "Doesn't matter Simon." She throws her arms around her big brother, Kaylee and her niece and hugs them tightly. "You're where you need to be now."

* * *

Translation Notes

Xiao gongzhu – little princess

Xin gan – sweetheart / darling


End file.
